“Wow, you’ve changed.”
You know that condescending tone people use — like change is something to be ashamed of?
But what if that change made us healthier? Helped us overcome trauma? Even saved our life?
Here’s the truth, ladies: if we’re the same person at 40 that we were at 20, that’s not progress. That’s a little bit more like being stuck in place.
So often, we’re scared of change — but it happens. We can’t control that. It happens around us, to us, and because of us. We grow by living, by experiencing, by surviving. Relationships frame and shape us. Struggles stretch us. Opportunities teach us. Even the hardest seasons reveal something about who we are becoming. Yes, sometimes change shows up through pain, loss, or mistakes. But even in those trial eras, we uncover lessons about our strength and our limits — lessons just as valuable as the wins.
And on the flip side, change also reveals where we thrive. It shows us the spaces where we build purpose, joy, and meaning.
I know that I’ve been outspoken about my own journey with mental health, counseling, and therapy. But growth has so many avenues: therapy, reading, education, lived life experience, faith, community. The list goes on.
The real question is: what do we DO with these things?
That answer is where change begins.
I promise you it’s normal to be scared of change.
It means stepping into a reality beyond our comfort zone. But let me ask you:
- Are the goals you have for your life bigger than where you stand right now?
(Of course they are — if not, they’re not really goals.) - Can you reach those goals by doing exactly what you’re doing right now?
(Nope. If that were true, you’d already be there!)
That means change is necessary. And action is the only way to get there. So why do we fight it?
Maybe instead of obsessing over how long it might take, or what we’ll have to leave behind to grow, let’s focus on what we’re becoming.
Did you catch that word — becoming?
It’s future tense. It’s movement. It’s progress. It’s the process of starting where you are right now and choosing to keep moving forward. Becoming isn’t one single moment, it’s a transition. A transformation. A continuous journey — with lessons, scars, and victories along the way.
Let’s challenge ourselves, ladies. We’ve already overcome 100% of the tough days. I know that — because you’re reading this. You’re here. You exist. But you were meant to do so much more.
- Tell me your goal.
- Tell me your dream.
- Say it out loud.
And then let’s get you on your way to becoming it!
I have faith in you — but the truth is, you need faith in you, too.
Now, I can’t promise you that it’s going to be easy. I won’t say it’ll be quick and painless. I myself have walked through a (relatively) crazy life. And, honestly – I still am. But I do my best to move within my life with faith, and humor, and love. I used to say that my life story would make a good book, but I’ve decided it’s really more like a Netflix series — because there’s no definitive end in sight. But that’s okay! I’m working on and learning how to keep BECOMING during the journey.
So now, when people say “Wow, you’ve changed,” I simply respond with:
“Thank you. We’re supposed to.”